Category Archives: Faith

#PrayforParis

17 Tuesday Nov 2015

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I’m at a crossroads.  My heart of faith tells me I need to be open to all people regardless of their religion, culture or where they come from.  My heart as an American, husband and father tells me to protect those I love, to seal borders and to carry a gun.  Wow!  Talk about some inner turmoil in my head…you may not want to be me right now.

I know this.  No one I know or have heard speak/tweet/sing has all the answers.  I have immense trust in God and believes He works in all situations for the good of those who love Him.  I have also learned He takes His time in revealing His ways.

While I wrestle with what to think about the Syrians and ISIS, I also wrestle with something a little less glamorized currently in our media, homes and churches.  While we pray for those in Paris and commit to stand in solidarity with them, why don’t we also hashtag #prayforSyria, #prayforTerrorists, #prayforMuslims, #prayforTheHomeless, #prayforTheUnemployed, #prayforSinners, #prayforPutin, #prayforObama/Clinton/Sanders/Trump/Carson/Rubio/Bush/et.al.

My point is this.  There are a number of things we need to address in this world of ours and in this country.  There are so many people who are hurting emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually that are overlooked daily while we rally around heartache and heartbreak in Paris, France.  I would take nothing away from the outpouring of compassion we have given the people affected by the senseless tragedy, only hope we become more aware of the senseless tragedies around us daily that need our prayers, our support, our finances and our hearts.

I’ll add one more hashtag I’m very affected by…#prayformetoo.

Grace and peace.

Mormons, Gay Marriage and the Law

23 Friday Oct 2015

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A New York Times article on today (10/23/15) by Jack Healy reports on the Mormons take on gay marriage and the law.  Dallin Oaks, described as a high-ranking apostle in the church, said, “Office holders remain free to draw upon their personal beliefs and motivations and advocate their positions in the public square.  But when acting as public officials, they are not free to apply personal convictions, religious or other, in place of the defined responsibilities of their public offices.”

The article is written regarding Kim Davis, the county clerk in Kentucky who has refused to provide marriage licenses for same-sex couples.  The article goes on to quote Jonathon Rauch with the Brookings Institute as saying it’s a pretty big deal the Mormons have embraced compromise over conflict.

Here’s my point.  The Mormons DID NOT compromise.  They followed what the Bible teaches, that we render unto the government what belongs to the government and that we live out our life of faith.  Jesus never called us to fight against government.  That is exactly what the Jews were wanting in a Messiah and Jesus wasn’t that guy.  He told us to love and care for the poor, the hurting, the ones thrown away by society, widows and orphans, the sick.  Never did he tell us to condone sin or make religion a political soapbox but to love and to care for those who need love and caring.

The Mormons are not compromising on same-sex marriage.  They still oppose it and call it sin.  Neither are they compromising on what an elected official of the government should do when required to follow the law.  Sure, fight against the law.  Certainly, speak out against anything that is not of God’s design.  But, when you lose, follow the law.

Kim Davis did what she did from personal conviction and I have no beef with that.  I don’t agree with her decision but it was/is HER decision.  I do not agree with all of Mormon teaching either.  However, I agree with them here;  same-sex marriage is wrong in the eyes of God and should be wrong in the law of the land.  It isn’t so we have to live with it but that doesn’t mean we cannot continue to stand firm and speak our convictions, vote our beliefs and trust God to take care of the outcomes.

Grace and peace.

I’m Frustrated Too…Obama, Guns and Following Christ

02 Friday Oct 2015

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This Oregon event has me frustrated.  I am frustrated enough that I can’t work right now and, instead, feel compelled to get some things out of my head and “on paper” so I can move on.

I’m frustrated the first thing our President does after something like this is call for gun control when it is painfully obvious people control is the needed action.

I’m frustrated that professing Christians call for more guns in the hands of people with licenses to carry them as if that is the way of Christ.  Seems like there was in issue with Peter and a sword and Jesus’ rebuke.

I’m frustrated at seeing a man walk the streets of the city I live in, obviously dealing with mental issues and appearing very angry and no one with the capacity to act doing anything about it.  I know people who have talked to this man and he needs serious, professional help.  He certainly doesn’t need to be walking our streets waiting for an incident that sets off something bad.  Or fatal.

I’m frustrated that Christ called for more love and society often calls for more war.  yes, I understand wanting to protect family and OUR way of life.  Interesting, though, that Christ called us to HIS way of life.

As a side note, one more proof this is not a Christian nation is to see all the people acting on “their civil liberties” when Christ-followers are called to deny self, give up their possessions (whether tangible or intangible-the things that come between me and Christ) and do things the way Jesus did them.

I’m frustrated because I want to be a Christ-follower but I want to do it my way.  I want what’s MINE.  I want to protect MY stuff.  I want what I deserve (forgetting what I deserve if I am committed to following Christ and then living for me).

I’m frustrated too, Mr. President.  Mental illness frustrates me.  Hatred frustrates me.  The lack of desire to fix the root of the problem frustrates me.  You, Mr. President, and your rhetoric frustrate me.  The desire of those who want to fix violence with violence frustrate me.  Most of all, I am frustrated by my own contradictions in thought and in practice.

I have plenty of questions and not so many answers.  Some of the answers, especially as they pertain to me and my actions, I try to avoid.  I am frustrated but I am also full of hope.  I believe Christ died for me and rose again so I can have salvation in eternity.  Christ chooses to love me through my failings and fallings.  Surely the desire of my heart and the tiny steps I try to make each day to look more like Christ and less like me please Him.

I am thankful in spite of my frustration.  I have hope in spite of my frustration.  I know there is something better for me even when I am frustrated.  Today is a bright day because of the future I have even though today also has some darkness and questions.  I am promised a reward, not an easy life.

I rest in the promise, in the hope, in salvation, in eternity with my Creator and Savior.

Grace and peace.

Show Me The Money…

06 Friday Feb 2015

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What a great line Cuba Gooding Jr. delivered in the movie Jerry Maguire.  Show me the money.  I think Americans really grabbed hold of this line because I know very few people who don’t want more of it.

I recently read an article in Forbes Daily that Americans greatest stressor in life is money.  In a survey the Harris Poll conducted with 3,100 people, 72% reported feeling stress about money.  Every 3 out of 4 people you know are feeling stress about their bank accounts.  Shoot, I wake up every morning and see a guy a little stressed about money.

As I think about that, I think about the houses I’ve been to or see lined up in certain areas around me that have to be 3,000 square feet or more, most with pools and firepits with relatively new cars in the driveway.  There’s a lot of people out there with really big mortgages and car payments and they have to make lots of money to keep up.  Then there are those who have racked up so much credit card debt and have nothing to show for it.  Sadly, I know those type of people too well.

There’s lots of money out there, lots of debt out there, lots of homeless people out there and lots of smart people out there.  Doesn’t it seem we should be able to put all of that together and come up with some rules for society that makes life better for everyone?  While I know we cannot legislate morality, let me dream for a minute…

Anyone making more than 7X the average income in their area will either be taxed at 40% on that amount OR will not be taxed at all on that income if given to IRS approved faith based agencies that help the poor among us.

Crazy, I know.

Lenders who charge an interest rate higher than 5% over the prime rate will pay a 75% tax on the income over that amount or will not be taxed on that income if given to IRS approved faith based agencies that help the poor among us.

Crazy, I know.

My daughter tells me I’m crazy all the time.

Any American citizen giving more than 10% of their gross income to IRS approved faith based agencies will not be taxed on the amounts over 10%.

Crazy, I know.

Yes, I know there would have to be regulation on approved agencies.  Yes, I know it isn’t as easy as writing it down in a random blog.  Yes, I know people will try to find loopholes.  I know nothing is easy when it comes to money.

BUT, what if money started flowing to organizations that are striving to help the poor, the beaten down, the mentally unstable…the veterans who have served our country and come back with physical and mental problems I cannot begin to fathom?  What if?

What if?

Grace and peace.

Stay Put

29 Monday Dec 2014

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Be still and know that I am God. – Psalm 46:10

Stillness is not a trait of our society.  AM/FM radio, HD radio, SiriusXM radio, Pandora, iTunes radio, Spotify, Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, LinkedIn…and whatever else you may be looking for, well, there’s an app for that.  But this post isn’t about busyness or the things that divert our attention away from peace.  It’s a little broader than that (at least in my mind).

I think one of the hardest things some people do is stay where we are.  The grass is greener elsewhere, right?  I am a “spiritual person” and I spend time thinking about how and where God wants to use me.  (I put spiritual person in quotes because I’m not exactly sure what it means-for me it simply means I seek knowledge and direction from a higher power who works through me.)  Those thoughts have often led me to seeing things I could do in other places, both near and far.  I have certainly had people encouraging me to get out of the house/community I am in.  Move away.  Start over.  Find a new direction.

For some people that is the right direction.  I believe, for me, that has not been the right advice.  I believe I have been led to stay right where I am; to work in the mess that is all around me.  I believe I am led to stay right in the middle of a life where people have spoke falsehoods about me, where people have questioned my motives and my choices and where I have lost so much, been attacked and wounded.  I believe I have been given an inner strength to withstand the blows I still feel at times, to withstand the rumors and looks I get or believe I get at times.

I have a desire to be a peacemaker and peacemakers are not needed where there is no conflict.  As convoluted as it seems, I believe I am right where I am supposed to be to use the gifts I have to help people find peace in the midst of storms.  If I can do it in my own life, I am a living example that it can happen.

Fortunately, I am blessed by people around me who are examples of sticking.  I have two couples who are very dear friends who have stuck when it appeared it would have been easier to split.  I have found a wife who has led me to experience joy and thankfulness in the very place where I once felt hurt and sadness.  Staying where I am has brought about many good things in my life even when it seemed it would be easier to go somewhere else.

It may be one of the toughest decisions I have made is to stay where I am.  I think it may be my calling to stay and to show people how peace can be found, even created, by making the choice to seek peace and to be strong in the face of conflict.

Staying has not been easy at times while also bringing someone into my life that convinces me staying was exactly the right thing and exactly where I was led.  Staying may not always be the right decision and my life isn’t the pattern for everyone else.  I know others are led to go and I applaud the courage that takes.  I also want to applaud those who stay because that takes a lot of courage too.

Grace and peace.

Bug Guts Revisited…Again

22 Monday Sep 2014

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Bug Guts

The above is a link to a post I wrote several years ago while going through a storm in life.  Since then I have been through some others.  I have gone through more than my share and I know there are people around me who are going through their own.

I encourage anyone reading this to be aware of the storms those around them are facing.  Give them a hug and let them know they are loved.

I encourage anyone reading this who is going through their own storm to know that brighter days are ahead.  I can’t tell you when and I sure won’t tell you it will be an easy journey, but it will get better.

I encourage anyone who has been through the storms and is now walking in the sunshine to share the love of God and encourage others with hope.

I have been through the storms and today God is leading me on a journey that is bringing great joy.  I will go forward not forgetting the storm while enjoying the peace this part of the trip includes.

Grace and peace.

Now Would Be Great, Thank You

08 Friday Aug 2014

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“Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer.” ~William S. Burroughs

When I want answers, I want them now.  I do not want to wait.  I do not want to be calm.  NOW!!!

One of my counselors once asked me the attributes of God.  I went straight to grace and love and such and his one word response was “slow”.  It stopped my whole thought process.  Slow?  Really?

I have been on a journey with lots of questions and none of the answers have come fast.  Oh, I was ready for fast answers, or so I thought, but being ready and getting them isn’t the same thing.  I’ve been on a job hunt for 2 years and there have been several times I knew “it was the one” only to see it slip away for one reason or another.

My challenge is learning to relax and be patient.  Now, I can certainly preach that message to others and have more than once.  It’s easy when I’m not the one emotionally invested.  However, when it’s me, when it’s my bank account, when it’s my family issues, there is no time to wait because I need to know NOW.

Through my years of counseling, I have come to accept that the majority of answers to my problems will come from my own mind, it just takes time.  Sometimes having those people who are neutral parties to talk it out with help and sometimes sitting under a large oak tree and clearing my mind is what I need.  And time.  It takes time sometimes.

I am thankful for answers that are coming to me right now.  A new job.  A new life with an incredible woman.  Returning to where my strongest relationships live.  Answers have been coming and the timing is remarkable.  The fact that I wanted answers two years ago is drowned about by the realization that maybe the best answers are the answers I am getting today.  Two years ago this job didn’t exist.  Two years ago I didn’t know my VSW.  Two years ago I didn’t appreciate a lot of little things I appreciate now.

Breathe.  Close my eyes.  Breathe.  Smile.  Trust.  Breathe.

Grace and peace.

Walking

05 Tuesday Aug 2014

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“As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil because you are with me.” – Psalms 23

I have gone through periods of lots of walking.  When I first accepted that a divorce was imminent in my life, I got on a treadmill every night and walked for an hour several nights a week.  When I realized a job I had accepted was going nowhere and I was cut off from everything and everyone I loved for days at a time, I got on a treadmill and walked for close to an hour during the week.

Looking back, I started walking just to have something to do and an outlet for my hurt and rage.  It has also come to symbolize the emotional and spiritual journey of the hard days of my life.  I feel, at times, like I am walking through a desert.  Dry and thirsty.  Just me and the coarse sand scraping against me, step by step, irritating my skin.  Irritating my mind and my soul.

The good thing about walking is that it leads somewhere.  It has led me in circles and it has led me to paths leaving the desert.  It has led me to people who challenge me and it has led me to people who love me and want the best for me.  It has led me through the valley of the shadow of death, as I know it at this stage of my life, and I believe it is leading me to bright, shining moments.

My friends who know me well know there are times I felt I was on the edge of a cliff and starting to fall off.  I am sure I was blowing the situation out of proportion at times but when the pain is constant and you just want it to stop, sometimes proportion is in the eyes of the one in pain.  Regardless, there were times I was ready to jump but one thing held me back.

Faith.

I do not have a perfect faith but I do have faith.  There have been many times I thought my faith would run out and woke up the next morning to find it still there but thin.  Other times it has been full and running over.  Part of faith for me is walking in it.  I may not know where I am going but I keep going, in faith, trusting that God’s ways are better than my ways and leaning on Him instead of leaning on my own understanding.

There have been times my life has been like walking on a treadmill.  I walk for an hour but still find myself in the same place I started.  Then there are the other times, the times that bring so much hope and excitement.  All the walking through the desert, through the coarse and painful sand and it seems I am walking into a valley full of hope and joy and excitement for what is now and what is coming.  I feel like I have walked in faith and now I get to look back on the lessons of the journey while enjoying the fruit of reaching a place of peace and rest.

Grace and peace.

I’m Singing

01 Friday Aug 2014

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Wow!  I do not have the words to do my heart and emotions justice today.  I have been on a long journey through a desert and I feel like I am seeing and experiencing an end to this part of my journey.  In the last week, I believe God has spoken answers to years of prayer, years of pleading, years of crying out in tears, years of screaming at Him and years of feeling lost and forgotten.  In all of that, I always looked back to God, my Lord, the Sovereign for hope and for answers.  I have heard so many “no’s” and “not now’s” and there have been times of desperation and times of emptiness and times of bitterness.  There have also been times of great joy and faith and hope and there have been moments where the desert gave way to green grass and cool water.

Today, I feel like I am in paradise.  It started last weekend.  A Friday evening dinner with my VSW.  Saturday lunch with two of my dearest and most treasured friends.  Sunday with some answers that blew me away with excitement.  Monday started a series of phone calls about a new job and culminated yesterday with an offer that brings me home to my VSW, my community of friends, my house and I’ll even include my dog in there.  For 8 months I have lived somewhere else and my VSW has stood by me, encouraged me, lifted me up, carried hope and prayed with me.  We have been tested and we have come through it strong.  I cannot begin to say how thankful I am for her.

Today, Chris Tomlin’s song is on my heart and coming from my lips.  I can’t help it.  I know lots of people who do not believe God is active in their lives or has concern for what happens here.  I have shared those thoughts and wonder myself at times but this day I am choosing to believe he is active in my life and he is putting things together for me that will change my life for the better.  I can’t explain why a woman moves to my community from another state to live but I chose to reach out to her one day and now she is the love of my life.  I can’t explain how a boot company would consider a person for a sales job of great magnitude for their company who has never been in sales before but I chose to take advantage of a door that was open and sell them on me.  Yes, I have taken action in my life to get where I am today but I also choose to believe God has something to do with moving the pieces around and putting opportunities in our path.

All that to say, I don’t have all the answers and never will but I know I have a wonderful woman in my life and now have a job that will bring us closer and allow us to go forward.  That has me singing.

Grace and peace.

A Reminder

24 Thursday Jul 2014

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MY LORD GOD, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it. Therefore I will trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.

  • Thomas Merton, “Thoughts in Solitude”