31 Monday Dec 2012
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Anxiety is a killer. I’m full of it right now but working to overcome it. I’m unemployed and about out of money. I’ve just entered a new year of my life that should be one where things are on track. They aren’t. That’s a recipe for internal disaster if ever I’ve known one.
This is a post I read on Tiny Buddha (www.tinybuddha.com) and one that I need to read and read again. I hope you enjoy.
http://tinybuddha.com/blog/overcoming-anxiety-moving-from-fear-to-presence/
Grace and peace.
30 Sunday Dec 2012
Posted in Christian Living, Life
The words of the title were words of advice the Managing Partner of a CPA firm I once worked for gave me during the closing days of tax season. Work harder, work faster. Isn’t this the mantra of our day, of our society? Work, work, work, Do more, more, more. Idle hands are the devil’s workshop. I have been taught that the value of my life was in my production. At church. And at work. And in relationships.
This is a post from my good friend, David Lewis. It’s not about production through more work but through peace. I love it and share it hoping it is a post I will come back to again and again.
http://themannaman.wordpress.com/2012/12/27/slow-down-you-move-too-fast/
Slow down. Find peace. Enjoy it. Live in it.
Grace and peace.
20 Thursday Dec 2012
Posted in Life
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I feel less like taxing my brain today than I normally do…
This Mayan calendar thing. As a Christian I don’t get worked up about it because I’m ready for the second coming. I don’t care whether Mayans have it right because we won’t be around to worry about it. On the other hand, if the world ends tomorrow I will be a little disgruntled I spent so much time in crowds Christmas shopping.
Wind. Good heavens, it is blowing like crazy in Decatur, TX. Last night I was driving through a dust storm. Today, part of the wall on my shed is gone.
I’m an Advocare guy. I don’t promote it but I like their products and buy it for my son and I primarily. Today I saw this video and I’m liking the idea…http://www.advocare.com/canyou24/
I just sold a watch on EBay. After the auction closes, the winner shoots me a message and asks if I will retract his offer. He said his wife was bidding on another watch and won so he doesn’t need this one. Uh, hello? Now he’s a ghost and I’ve got to drag EBay into the fray. Frustrating.
I used to watch a lot of college basketball. A LOT. The only time I’ve watched a full game in the last two years is during March Madness. What’s happened to me?
I’ve started making sausage balls for the kids to eat. They love them and, well, I do too. I made the biggest batch I’ve ever attempted a few nights ago. When the timer went off, I decided I needed to leave them in for 2 more minutes. I didn’t reset the timer. 10 minutes later the smell reminded me I had not taken them out. Oops.
Take out Mexican food is never as good at eat-in Mexican food. I’m not counting fast food restaurants in that statement.
I’m still heartbroken over the Newtown, CT tragedy. I watched a bit of President Obama’s comments on his new task force and hope something happens that will limit these incidents. While I don’t agree with everyone else all the time, it is good that dialogue will start and I hope all the issues will be on the table to address. A baseball blogger, Jamey Newberg, had a book release party last night with lots of auction items and has raised over $19,000 for the family of one of the girls killed in the school who have North Texas/Texas Rangers roots. I cannot imagine losing one of my children like that. I pray the Lord heals those families in ways that no mortal will ever be able to understand.
Grace and peace.
19 Wednesday Dec 2012
Posted in Life
Tonight is one of those special nights. I’m listening to the voices of my daughter and her friends as they watch movies and celebrate Christmas with each other. They have all gone to different schools and are coming back together for the first time since August. There is joy, laughing, intense story-telling and great recollections. They are a group who picks up wherever they left off. Of course, it’s different in this time of Facebook, Twitter, Skype, Oovoo and the all the other technology they have to stay connected.
The real joy is mine though. I am home alone. Alot. It’s my choice so I do enjoy the peace and quiet but I also long for the days when I was at home with my children every night, hearing their voices, being in their presence.
Tonight, while not sitting in their midst the whole night, I have truly enjoyed my interaction with them and am so thankful to their youthful, happy voices. They still have their lives and the world in front of them and are enjoying times of little responsibility, little stress, little fear. I’m a bit envious of their position in life.
Mostly, I’m just happy as I hear them laugh, hear them talk, debate, joke, speak in foreign accents…I’m just happy.
Grace and peace.
18 Tuesday Dec 2012
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Where is God? It’s the easy question to ask after what just happened in Newtown, Connecticut. Where is God?
Some would say our problems start with prayer not being a part of the daily school routine. Really? I would say that God IS in schools when He is in in the heart and actions of those in the schools. I would say that prayer exists in schools when believers take the time to pray – alone or with group of people.
I can’t help but wonder how many people railing against prayer being taken out of school allow their children to spend their time on the X-Box and PS3 playing Call of Duty or Hitman or Grand Theft Auto. Where is God in that? Where is God in spending hours on Facebook, Twitter or Pinterest? Where is God on HBO or TNT or most of the network channels? Where is God in the lyrics of so many of the songs being played over and over.
I am not saying that any of these activities are bad in and of themselves (well, some of the video games are over the top, song lyrics are reprehensible and TV shows full of smut) and some of these things offer opportunities for fellowship where God can be exalted (think Duck Dynasty on A&E!).
The point is, God is wherever we invite Him to be. God is in our midst whether we are reading the Bible or overindulging at the bar. God is in our midst whether times are great and we don’t really need him or we are confused and baffled over why 20 children are murdered and we don’t know why He didn’t prevent it. God is always in our presence. The question may be do we always seek God so that we can live in His presence?
Grace and peace.
14 Friday Dec 2012
Posted in Christian Living, Life
I talked about the power fear has over me. It still resonates through my body this day. The other thing about fear is it’s weight. Man, it is heavy. At times it weighs down on my so much it almost pushes all the air out of my body. Other times it weighs so much it simply paralyzes me. It makes my head hurt and disrupts my thoughts. It leaves me feeling like I am buried under a pile of rocks, alone, with nowhere to go.
I’m thankful for friends I can call on. They help lift the weight. They help carry the burden at times. The song, sung by Bill Withers (and recently done so well by Nicholas David on The Voice) has lyrics I’ve never listened to or caught before reading them today. The third stanza hit me like a truck today.
Sometimes in our lives
We all have pain
We all have sorrow
But if we are wise
We know that there’s always tomorrow
Lean on me, when you’re not strong
And I’ll be your friend
I’ll help you carry on
For it won’t be long
‘Til I’m gonna need
Somebody to lean on
Please swallow your pride
If I have things you need to borrow
For no one can fill those of your needs
That you won’t let show
You just call on me brother, when you need a hand (Chorus)
We all need somebody to lean on
I just might have a problem that you’d understand
We all need somebody to lean on
Second Verse
(Chorus)
If there is a load you have to bear
That you can’t carry
I’m right up the road
I’ll share your load
If you just call me
Just calling is hard sometimes. The weight of fear crushes my hopes, my dreams, my faith and my ability to call on people at times. The weight of fear reminds me that I cannot do things on my own and tells me I am weak because of it, that I will fail, that I will not get out of this present situation without being battered and broken.
Like so many others, I turn to God and call out to him but I have seen prayers answered in painful ways, I have seen tears that don’t stop flowing, pain that never goes away, relationships destroyed. God doesn’t always tie things up with a pretty red bow…and that drives my fear even more. The questions of “what if” roll through my mind like a freight train – loud, earth-shaking, powerful – and leave the weight of fear on my shoulders.
Still, I will call on God and ask that He do more than I can imagine, that he will heal and make new, that he will provide so that I can share in abundance and redemption on this earth as well as in the next life. I will slowly, but surely, call on friends and ask them to pray, to help carry my burden. The power and weight of fear will lurk and will reach inside me at times, but for today I will still hold on to hope for a better tomorrow. For if I don’t have hope, what do I have?
Grace and peace.
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