The Rangers go to New York and Boston and leave with a 3 wins and 3 losses record. WOW! For Rangers fans who have suffered through years of bad pitching and bad defense, the start to this season is fun to watch. I bet there are plenty, like me, who keep preparing for the wheels to fall off but I’m not so sure they will. Nelson Cruz, the guy who was out of options, who couldn’t get off to a good start at the top level, has gone deep 17 times. Kinsler, Andrus, Young, Davis…strong. Millwood, Feldman, Wonderboy (Holland)…steady. Padilla…a nut job who can pitch pretty well when his head is in the game. This is fun, really fun to watch.
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Have you ever waited on something to happen and thought it never would? Did you get frustrated? Ready to give up? I know I feel that way at times and I wonder if God ever does. For some of us, coming to a true relationship with God has taken a long time with several missteps (to put it kindly) along the way. I wonder if He ever got frustrated? Ever wanted to give up?

Can you imagine hearing God say “(state your name), I’m tired of trying, I’m tired of waiting, I’m frustrated and I’m ready to give up on you.” The first time I imagined that question with my name in the blank, it brought me to tears and sent chills down my spine. It still does at times because it’s a question I continue to use when I feel myself drifting away from complete trust and faith in God, a trust and faith that He will bring to a place greater than what I am hoping for, greater than I can likely imagine. It doesn’t mean the path is all sunshine and roses because there are evil forces along with the way wanting me to quit, to give up. But God is good, He’s never given up on me, He never quit trying, He never quit loving me…and He never will.

I still hear the voices and feel the pull to walk away but the question hasn’t let me do that. I want to live in the answer, the answer that says “I am with you always…”

I have a friend who is leaving for a Colorado vacation today. Lucky dog.

That, in itself, pretty well has me shut down from having any other thoughts today.

The only “do what?” thought is that he is going to be camping the whole time. He said he probably spent more on camping equipment than he would have on a nice hotel but he didn’t want a TV wherever he was.

I’m not sure the idea of unplugging the TV crossed his mind. Even cutting the power cord off the TV and paying to replace it would be worth it when considering sleeping in a bed or on the ground at our advanced ages.

OK, I’m picking at him because he will spend the next week in Colorado and I won’t…but my day is coming quickly!

I hope to be back next week with some better thoughts to go exploring with. Have a great weekend and remember that God loves you and wants you in a relationship with Him that is full of the best He has to offer – amazing grace, incredible love and compassion and a beautiful hope for what lies before us.

I’m working on thoughts that might make the blog next week. It’s kind my mental motor locked down right now.

ESPN’s #2 Play of the Day last night – 2 clips of Elvis Andrus making some lights out plays against the Evil Empire. Rangers win! Rangers win!

I wonder what they will do with Vincente Padilla. I can’t imagine they will get much for him in a trade but I wonder if they would want much. He’s supposed to be the number 2 guy but he’s a bit of a head-case. Dump all or most of his salary with the plan to bring in Ben Sheets and pull Perez up from the minors? Is a Blalock for a pitcher trade still in the works? It’s going to be an interesting year.

Did you hear about the banker jumping from the 14th floor of a parking garage yesterday? Saw a snippet that the ME ruled he jumped on his own. Tragic. I can only imagine the pain that drove him to do that.

I’ve only heard snippets about Obama’s speech in Egypt yesterday. I wonder how he’s been received and I wonder how he’s representing the USA. I used to be much more wrapped up in all of that but don’t have near the concern or time for it anymore. I’m not too worried about what Obama is going to do because I have come to believe this country has been on a downhill slide for several years and it has little to do with who’s in office but everything to do with the condition of the people of this country.

Kids sure spend a lot of time on Facebook while they are in school. Social media is one more avenue that good things can come from but a whole lot of bad things can come from. It’s another one of those things that can be neat but we would not be any worse off if it went away.

I upgraded to 5MB Internet service at home. I’m not sure I can tell the difference yet.

I love reading Romans. There’s more to learn every time I open it up.

I was up later than I wanted to be last night and I’m feeling it this morning. I’m wondering if anyone will mind me drinking coffee straight from the coffee pot.

I think the Yankees have the Rangers number. Things looked good with Cruz hit his 3-run homer to put the Rangers ahead 3-2…then the Yankees tacked on 10 runs and it didn’t look so good. Thank goodness the Angels were facing Roy Halladay and lost. Maybe tonight will be better for the Rangers but I’m starting to think the pinstripes are the Rangers kryptonite.

Can someone turn the humidity down? Please.

Hope is a wonderful thing. Remaining hopeful seems to lift me up, boosts my spirit, keeps me smiling and singing (at least on the inside). At times, hope seems to wane but my faith in God keeps bringing it back. I thought about how hope works in my life as I read the following from John Eldredge:

If for all practical purposes we believe that this life is our best shot at happiness, if this is as good as it gets, we will live as desperate, demanding, and eventually despairing men and women. We will place on this world a burden it was never intended to bear. We will try to find a way to sneak back into the Garden and when that fails, as it always does, our heart fails as well. If truth be told, most of us live as though this life is our only hope.

In his wonderful book The Eclipse of Heaven, A. J. Conyers put it quite simply: “We live in a world no longer under heaven.” All the crises of the human soul flow from there. All our addictions and depressions, the rage that simmers just beneath the surface of our Christian facade, and the deadness that characterizes so much of our lives has a common root: We think this is as good as it gets. Take away the hope of arrival and our journey becomes the Battan death march. The best human life is unspeakably sad. Even if we manage to escape some of the bigger tragedies (and few of us do), life rarely matches our expectations. When we do get a taste of what we really long for, it never lasts. Every vacation eventually comes to an end. Friends move away. Our careers don’t quite pan out. Sadly, we feel guilty about our disappointment, as though we ought to be more grateful.

Of course we’re disappointed—we’re made for so much more. “He has also set eternity in the hearts” (Eccl. 3:11). Our longing for heaven whispers to us in our disappointments and screams through our agony. “If I find in myself desires which nothing in this world can satisfy,” C. S. Lewis wrote, “the only logical explanation is that I was made for another world.”

(The Sacred Romance , 179–80)

It was pouring down when I took the kids to school. Once I dropped them off and made my way into the office, it stopped. I’m OK with it raining on Mondays and Tuesdays between 8 and 11 in the morning and after 9 at night. I should avoid getting wet and it leaves the weekends open for outside activities. Seems reasonable, doesn’t it?
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Rangers play in New York tonight. It would be good to win this series before heading into Boston. If the Rangers come out of this with more wins than losses they have to be considered as a contender. If they don’t, it shows there is more work to be done which isn’t all bad either. The bullpen still isn’t as good as anyone would want it. I’m guessing the coming months will bring a trade for some pitching and the signing of Ben Sheets. If Nefatali Perez is able to come to the bullpen with his 100mph heat, Holland continues to be steady, Feldman continues to improve and Sheets can be a reliable starter…wow. This could be really fun.

Consider that and the idea of Hamilton and Chris Davis hitting like they are capable of and you’ve got a good mix if everyone can execute. WOW. This could be really fun!
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I’m just a few days reading into Oswald Chamber’s My Utmost for His Highest and loving it. It’s as if he was writing it just for me and his comments challenge me to go deeper with God and remind me to wait on Him, rely on Him, trust in Him, live for Him.

The 50th anniversary party for my parents was great. I got to see some old friends I hadn’t seen in 20 years and catch up with some of my high school friends. Of course, it wasn’t about me but I enjoyed it. It was good to see so many people come, some from far distances, for my parents. It was special to see so many, young and old, come to honor them for 50 years of marriage and for being a part of the lives of so many people.
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The Rangers are still tearing it up. There’s still room for some of you nay-sayers to jump on the bandwagon.
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More Oswald Chambers that struck me last week…”We seem to think that God wants us to give up things! God purified Abraham from this error and the same process is at work in our lives. God never tells us to give up things just for the sake of giving them up, but He tells us to give them up for the sake of the only thing worth having, namely, life with Him.”

I have struggled with all the stuff I have and all the stuff I do and have, at times, agonized over what it meant for me as a Christian. Over time, I have come to realize that what I have isn’t the issue. Instead, the issue is what I willing to give. Am I giving my money? Am I giving my time? Am I giving my heart? As I draw closer to my God, it’s easier to understand that He isn’t a God desiring to take away but a God desiring to give. If I am going to walk with God, I must be prepared to give and the life and things that I have will take care of themselves.

I am looking forward to finding what God calls me to give and I am looking forward to building my relationship with Him as I learn to be a servant.

This weekend, my parents will celebrate 50 years of marriage. It is a great testament to love and devotion and I honor them at this special time. I can only imagine that over 50 years there have been ups-and-downs that they have weathered and enjoyed. I have heard stories of tough times when money was tight. I’m also aware of 18 years of pure bliss – the years I was living at home being a perfect angel.

I am thankful for my parents and thank God for them and all they have taught me and for the love they have given me. On this special weekend, I pray that they feel the love God has for both of them and thank Him for their love for me and so many others that they have touched.

Mom and Dad, thank you for all that you are and all that you do.

No need to mention the Rangers today.

I’m still stuck on the song I mentioned a few blogs ago, “The Motions” that Matthew West sings. It keeps me thinking about where I’ve been and where I hope to go and how different those two episodes of life might look.

I watched a video that struck me the other day too. A speaker was telling the audience that he thought we could see a better idea of what God intended the church to be at an AA meeting than in an institutional church setting. I don’t believe I disagree with him. You go to AA because a) a judge has ordered you to or b) you’ve got some problems you need to find a way to deal with. For those who go because of “b”, there are some really honest stories told, some tough thoughts/feelings/actions are opened up and healing can happen. That’s what church, the body of Christ, should be because that is what Christ is; the one I should be really honest with, the one I should bear all my ugliness, my hurts, my scars, my sins to and the one who will begin the healing.

I have grown up in churches where I have heard more complaining or gossip about what someone is doing than being aware of people going to help the hurting. I have heard people spend time asking what the one who went forward did or say “what a shame” or “they brought it on themselves” and other things of that nature but did not stop to offer prayers or help or a shoulder to cry on. I wish I could say it was someone else but I am just as guilty.

I don’t want the church to be more like AA; I want it to be incomparable to any organization we can imagine. I don’t want the church to be a place where brothers and sisters feel safe but a place where brothers and sisters and people dealing with every kind of sin Jesus so their healing can begin. I don’t want to be a part of a church that is going through the motions but a church that is the active body of Christ – one that certainly teaches truth, but even more, lives it, exudes it, a church that shows the irresistible nature of the Christ.

The challenge is that it doesn’t fall to the Elders or the ministers – it starts with me. What will I do today? How will I show Christ to people today? How will I let people know there is healing for their pain and suffering, that there is grace and peace and salvation in our Lord?

At 44 years of age, I realize I just can’t stay out as late as I used to. I had the joy of experiencing the Rangers 2 1/2 rain delay last night. We hung on until the 6th inning but had to call it a night which put me to bed way late. I’ll be paying for it today but it was great seeing a Rangers win against the Yankees.
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I hope my title isn’t taking badly but it’s a question I have asked myself several times. Each day, a random verse pops up on my blog and every now and then, when I’m really hitting a low spot of some sort, the verse speaks volumes to me. I have jokingly said God must be reading my blog and giving me the exact scripture I need that day. I like to think there might be a little truth to that but the real story is that the Bible is full of hope and compassion and love and reading a little bit of scripture every day reinforces the real importance of being in God’s word all the time. I have read more this year than I have in a long time, maybe ever, and I feel the benefits of the time I spend in how I feel on the inside. It doesn’t take away my problems but it gives me so much peace in living through them and helps me remember to trust God – trust that He will carry my load.

God may not read blogs but I am reminded over and over how important it is for me to read God’s words. My words might bring a laugh or a tear but His words bring life.

The Rangers loss yesterday…that was a hard thing in a relatively insignificant way. It was hard to watch for a fan but not such a big deal in considering all that is happening in the world.

I was forwarded a video by a missionary friend of mine that is a hard thing to watch. The closer I get to God, the harder this type of video is to watch. Not hard in a sad or disgusting way but hard in that it turns my stomach that people live in the condition they do. At the same time, their thankfulness for scraps speaks volumes about the lives that most of us live. If you’ve got about 6 minutes, watch this: http://www.cultureunplugged.com/play/1081/Chicken-a-la-Carte