Anger is an emotion I wrestle with too often. Generally I do a good job of keeping it in check but too often for me, I don’t and I am wrestling with it today. I’m wrestling with it because in the course of trying to help boys enjoy playing baseball, I have to deal with parents who’s ego and single-mindedness has them dampening the spirit of the team. If you’ve coached or are close to someone who has coached, you probably know the drill. We’re not playing their little angel enough, pitching him enough, using him the right way. Their little angel hit better, ran better and caught better before he was on our team. Now there are some parents holding the rest of the team hostage until they decide if they want to play with us any longer. Part of me wants to throw in the towel but I have a little angel too and he wants to play baseball. He will overlook the problems if he can put on the uniform and get in the field. His passion and desire to play the game are the only things that keep me from walking away. So, we have to have a big meeting tomorrow and talk through it all and I’m worried my anger will come through. It’s the devil’s hook into me, one of the places he can really operate on me and pull me away from what I need to be.

Tomorrow night I have two battles. One is with a bunch of silly parents, the other with Satan. I hope I overcome both obstacles tomorrow but in the end, I’ve got to put my focus on the bigger one, the battle to control my anger and hope the other one will take care of itself.

It was saddening and sickening to hear about the murders in Virginia yesterday. What makes people do such heinous things? I have no ability to make sense of it or say anything that can make anyone feel any better at this time other than to pray that God will be sought out in this tragedy.

Saying that, what does get under my skin is listening to the talking heads on TV second guess the decisions the school administration and police officers made. I have a feeling that if a gunman walked into CNN or ABC today and started spraying bullets around, many of these arm-chair quarterbacks would be ducking for cover and not have a clue how to handle themselves. I trust that if mistakes were made, all of that will be considered by those involved in the near future and used to help so I can’t understand why these know-it-alls feel the need to pontificate on something they know little about.
_________________________________________________________

I’m enjoying the rain today. I hope we can avoid the bad stuff and just enjoy the wet stuff.

How many of your check this or some other blog daily (or more than once if it isn’t up at the normal time)? I’ve found myself falling into that routine, checking some blogs that I read daily or less frequently. A friend recently posted that he may quit daily blogging and some of us did some combination of encouraging him to keep posting, telling him why we enjoyed it or threatening physical harm to his golf equipment.

This whole blog thing came across my mind last night at church while we were celebrating the successes of our kids at LTC (Leadership Training for Christ). One young lady participated in Daily Devotional where she was challenged to read her Bible for 15 minutes every day, pray and keep a journal of what she studied and prayed about. One. Just one participated in an event and I must say I was ashamed of myself. I can read blogs everyday, I can scan web pages for sports updates, I can watch the news or read a good thriller, I can find time to eat and do all sorts of things that appeal to me but I’m not making time to read the Bible a measly 15 minutes a day.

Today I am going to work on changing that. I’m also going to make a point to thank that young lady for helping me remember what my priorities should be.

I’m sick of the Don Imus discussion. Maybe because of my age, my race, my beliefs I have no reason to weigh in or offer an opinion but it seems everybody else with a microphone is.

Imus said a bad thing that was offensive to certain people. He should be embarrased and apologize and so far he has admitted to his humiliation and has apologized. I think it is important for his employers to decide what punishment is right and whether it be a suspension or termination, it is their decision to make.

What irritates me the most about the whole thing is hearing the mouthpieces say it’s OK for one group to use certain terminology but others are not allowed to because it then becomes offensive. If it is offensive, it is offensive. That’s it. If I call my kids “nit-wits” should I be surprised if someone else calls them “nit-wits” or should I expect it? If people of color (I don’t know the PC term of the day) can use the “n-word” then why would anyone be surprised if everyone uses the same word?

In the infamous words of Rodney King, can’t we just all get along? What if (this is a crazy idea), what if we all treated people with respect? What if we never used derogatory words of any type to describe someone? I don’t know…just a thought.

The question in the youth group class last night was “what’s the most amazing thing you’ve seen?” Being the only parent in the room, I was thinking my answer was the birth of my children. It’s an amazing time filled with so many emotions. As my children have grown, it has been a continued state of amazement, worry, joy, fear – so many things that every parent goes through with children.

I couldn’t help but think about how God feels when we decide to accept the grace He has given us and whether he goes through the roller-coaster of emotions that we do. I cannot comprehend God and I cannot begin to imagine all that He thinks and feels but I can’t help but think that He shares some of our same feelings as we look at our children.

One of the scriptures shared last night was Jesus saying he was amazed by the people’s lack of faith. I hope I am less often causing God to be amazed by my lack of faith and more often creating joy in Him by my faith and through my faith serving Him.

I played catch-up with “24” last night having missed the last two episodes. I wonder if anything like this really happens in the course of a day, a week or a month. This poor guy hasn’t had any sleep, he’s battling terrorists with nuclear weapons and one bad thing follows every good thing. It’s a miserable 24 hours, that’s for sure. Realizing the show is fiction, I still wonder what goes on sometimes. We know there have been and likely are people living in our country who want or plan to do something very damaging to us. Who is watching them? What are the stakes?
________________________________________________________

On a happier note, what was thought to be lice in our county courthouse now only be mites. It’s great when your town makes the news because the courthouse is shut down due to lice (or “crabs” as known by some). I don’t know much about mites but it sounds better than crabs.
________________________________________________________

It’s Wednesday. I feel like I’ve been blessed over the past few months getting to spend some time with the youth group at church on Wednesday nights. There are some really, really neat kids that are part of our church group and they bring a number of friends with them each week. I’ve enjoyed getting to know them and miss not being there when I’m traveling.

It’s also Casa Torres night with our friends. Good food, good friends…a good night.

In case you didn’t happen to see the update in yesterday’s post, one dog (the yellow lab) has been found. She was close by at someone’s house who took care of her and fed her prime rib. It was good to see her when I pulled up and she is now home and locks have been put on the gate latches.

Someone called saying they thought they saw the other dog but when I went looking there was no dog around. We’ll see.

As I went to pick up Bea, I couldn’t help put think about the shepherd who searches for a lost sheep. He knows it could be lost to wolves but he still looks, hoping. I’m thankful for a shepherd who searches for me when I am lost and who desires to find me and bring me back safe to where I should be.

Another Monday, another list of things that need to be done, another mountain growing in front of me. It seems like it happens more often than not and I have pretty well survived those times in the past and I trust this week will be the same.

We were gone for the weekend and came home to our dogs being gone. A couple of our neighbors and relatives looked for them Saturday to no avail. We went out looking and calling for them last night when we got home but no luck. We’ve had some trouble with animals over the past few years. It’s odd looking out the back door and not seeing them running around or waiting for something to eat. ***UPDATE*** We have found one of the dogs. A man just a few miles away caught our lab (Bea) and kept her over the weekend. He said she really loves prime rib.

The weekend was great. LTC was incredible again with bunches of kids doing what they have been practicing for weeks and months. It was fun to see them perform their activity and it was fun seeing them get to fellowship and spend time with each other. I always enjoy watching the activity even though I hate being in crowds in confined spaces.

Have a great week conquering your mountains.

Tomorrow is the home opener for the Rangers. Even though they are coming off a horrific outing in Anaheim, they return to the Ballpark with history being just that and hope for a turnaround that gets them kickstarted to a great year. I love opening days. It’s a day game, the best way to watch a game when the temperature is below 90. Fireworks, fresh-cut grass, bands, a flyover…and hope for a winning season. I can’t wait.

The really big event for us and for many in our church family is LTC. Watching these kids finally do what they have been working on and practicing for over months is a blessing. I don’t know how many kids we have participating from our church (along with a number of kids who don’t regularly attend our church but come to participate in LTC) but there are a bunch of them along with thousands from other churches who will be there. They all come to celebrate Christ, to learn and grow in their knowledge of him and their ability to share that knowledge – not just knowledge but the hope and joy we have through Christ. I know this year, just like others, I will have chills because of some performances, tears of joy because of others and moments of reflection from others. I can’t wait.

The really, really big event is the commemoration of the resurrection. I want to soak it in this year, to feel closer to a Savior who died for me, to be humbled and thankful for a love I cannot measure and that I really can’t comprehend. What a beautiful event. Even more, what a beautiful love my God has for me.

It seem the ink disaster has been somewhat averted. Thanks for the ink removal tips. It sounds like I’m not the only one who forgets to check their pockets now and again.
_____________________________________________________________

I was reminded yesterday that there are people around us suffering emotionally and spiritually that we often are not aware of. They are going through pain, fear, worry, maybe even regret. When I was told about a situation yesterday, all I could think to do was pray that God would intervene, that He would be able to reach in and help even if those involved weren’t turned to Him at that moment. The people directly involved and many who may be hurt indirectly will all need to recover from what has happened and I just don’t know how a true recovery can work without God.

I’ve been there and would guess you may have too. I’ve said things or done things that have hurt people deeply and recovery could not happen without God. The only joy I have is knowing that God will forgive me, that He will cover me with mercy, with the blood of the Lamb and my relationship with Him can be made new. I hope when someone hurts me that I will extend the forgiveness that I have received from my Creator, my Lord and my Savior. I hope we can all fill that power when we hurt or have been hurt. I hope we will all know the joy of forgiveness and forgiving.

I’ve never really thought about forgiveness from me requires a sacrifice on my part. It’s a simple sacrifice really, just giving up my pride, my idea of justification, my self-pity. Those things are such an insignificant price to pay when I realize my God gave up His son for my forgiveness. When I frame it in that context, that I don’t have to give up my son, just my own thoughts and ideas, it becomes very easy for me to forgive.

I may have wandered off a bit from where I started but as I think about it, our recovery from anything is sped up or slowed down by forgiveness. The ability to forgive ourselves, the forgiveness we give or get and our grasp of the forgiveness we have received from God all play a role in recovering from anything.