My knees hurt. My wife has been incredible in setting an example and encouraging me to exercise. I appreciate her so much. I’m eating a little better, feeling a little better and getting my blood-glucose control in better condition. Along with that comes a little pain. My knees have been the culprit of late, hurting through the night causing me to wake up in discomfort. I’m giving Motrin and Tylenol some business in helping reduce the pain but it’s not 100% effective. Still, I’ll learn to live with a little pain when I know the overall benefits of what I’m doing.
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Last night we heard a speaker talk about being prayer warriors. One of his comments struck a chord with me because it’s something we all know to be true but too easily forget. He said, “Satan knows the power of prayer better than we do.” Amen, brother. I know prayer works but just like the examples he used last night, I too often pray only when I’m scared or need something. I know some of that is Satan’s work, pushing me to forget to talk to God at all times because Satan knows the power of prayer.

Let it be that God’s people know the power of prayer and use it as a weapon against the evil forces day-by-day, minute-by-minute.

Last week, I blogged a bit about a gentleman we have hired who made a big mistake and has paid considerably for it. Because of the nature of what he did, I was concerned about how other employees might address him working here.

Today, I am happy to say that I have been pleasantly surprised by the hearts of some people who work here. I would guess there are some negative comments or feelings but I’ve asked and no one has heard anything. I suppose the majority have said nothing but the few who have spoken up to me have made a lasting impression. They have had comments of thanksgiving that he would get a second chance here, questions of what they could do to help him.

The responses were opposite of what I was afraid I would hear. I thank God for the people who have spoken up and the knowledge that God is with people through the storms.

My wife started on a mission several months ago to get her teaching certificate. She decided at some point that being able to teach would be a good alternative if and when she needed to re-enter the workforce. She breezed through some college courses she had to take. She did great through the certification classes and tests she had to take. Now, she begins the third and final leg – student teaching.

After 13 years of being a stay-at-home mom, she is up and going to work. In some ways, it is similar to what she has been doing because she doesn’t get paid to student teach! We both agree that it has been a blessing that she has been able to be at home with the kids and neither of us have any idea of when or where she might actually begin a teaching career. Yet today is a day of big change.

I am pretty sure she’s a little bit nervous. The next 13 weeks will be very different than the past 13 years. I know she will go through student teaching with flying colors, there’s no question in my mind. She’s working with a friend of ours who is a veteran teacher and will be a great mentor for her. I am a little nervous too. Change is always a little unnerving yet she is working through it with a plan to accomplish this step of her goal.

I’m praying for her. Praying that she will have peace through all of this. Praying that she will find God’s will through it. Praying that she can have a good influence on the adults and kids she will come in contact with. I know she will do this well and she will touch people in the process.

I seem to have a focus on spiritual warfare right now and I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s because I’m seeing some of the demons people are fighting. Maybe it’s because of some of the demons I think I’m fighting. The one thing I do know is that there is a battle and it comes in many forms. I heard a speaker the other night mention that we might be fighting the battle against drugs, alcohol, sex, pornography…and if we aren’t fighting the battle against the “big” ones that are easy to see, maybe we are fighting it against pride or something we hide better.

Today, I know this. I am a broken sinner and the only way, the only way I’m going to win the battle is with God. I have trouble laying it all at his feet. I want to be in control, suggest ways I think the outcome would work best. I haven’t figured out how to turn complete control over to God – yet- but I’m working on it.

It’s another one of those days. So many things I need to get done but other crises around the office are taking time from what I need to accomplish. It wears me thin after awhile and I am thankful the weekend is here…even though I will now need to work through some part of it. This week has been a mental grind and when that happens, it leaves a blog with little to say. I know you are sorely disappointed…or that you are thinking it’s a blog that always has so little to say. 🙂
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As I prepare for my first mentally exhausting battle this morning, I cannot help but think of the message I heard Wednesday night. It was about Legion, the man filled with many demons and how Jesus drove those demons away. I know today there is a spiritual battle raging around me and I am praying that Jesus will drive the demons away. With the sound of His voice, they will be gone. I know I cannot battle the demons that invade my life on my own. I need the voice of my Savior to drive them away.
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I apologize for the down note of the blog today but I know this. I have asked God to walk beside me and no matter what comes my way, there is a better future ahead of me. I may find it in hours or days or years but the one thing I know is that it is coming. Hallelujah!

The days are getting harder. Tomorrow will be a day that I can’t imagine yet. We are bringing in a brother in Christ who made a bad, bad mistake and he will pay for it forever. We are giving him a chance to start proving himself but I know there will be people who will not give him a chance. I understand their fear and concern and I don’t know what to expect. Will people just shun him or will they call him names, will they gossip and start rumors?

I would ask for your prayers for this situation, that this time and place will be a light, that God will be allowed to work in hearts and lives and that He will be glorified.

As I have gotten older, I’ve never really felt my age. I know how many years I have been around but still think I’m 10 years younger. However, I have noticed more things recently that remind me I’m not getting younger. Knees that ache at night after exercise, a torn calf muscle, a constant pull of things to be done and looking at the university publication where my class is creeping closer to the front and there are 20 years of graduates behind me. Yikes.

Something greater than all those, for me, is the mental pull to figure out what God has in store for me. I look back on the past 40+ years and see peaks and valleys, successes and failures, rights and wrongs and I wonder what my path is to come. I wonder how God will use me, what things from my past He will use as I go through the future, what tests are yet to come my way, how will I affect the people I come in contact with. Twenty years ago I was certainly thinking more about my career, a family to come and getting the “things” I/we would want. Today, I am much more focused on how God is using me and going to use me. Much of me wants to see the script, to know ahead of time what is to come but I know that is not possible. Instead, I approach the future with a mixture of fear and wonder.

I don’t know how many years I have left on earth or what is to come but I do know this; my prayer is that whatever comes my way, I serve God and His desires above my own.

My mind is a beehive of thoughts and none of them are complete. It seems like I have hundreds of things I need to do and don’t know where or how to start with some of them. Maybe I should quit blogging and get to business.
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I saw something this morning that said a study of Abraham Lincoln’s face reveals one side is shorter than the other side. Is that something people are really interested in?
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School is starting soon. In some ways it will be nice to be back in a routine. On the other hand, there is the mental problem of having to be somewhere. I think the kids are somewhat excited if only because they get to see their friends on a daily basis.
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We were talking with a neighbor last night about our kids staying inside so much. As I thought about it after the conversation, I played outside a lot, rode my bike all over the place and never worried about the bad people who might harm a child. We complain because our kids stay inside but then we don’t let them get out much without us because of fear. It’s sad that it is that way today.
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My 13 year old as taken to the texting life with her new phone. As much as I hated to get it and still wonder what kind of trouble will come from it, being able to stay in touch with her friends is a cool thing. The best in my eyes is that she is staying in touch with a friend whose family moved to Big Spring. They are out there in the middle of nowhere (we miss you) and she and her friend can keep “talking” to each other. Good stuff.

On this day 13 years ago my life changed dramatically, forever, and for the better. On this day 13 years ago, my wife and I woke up early and headed to the hospital where the birth of our first child would occur. On this day 13 years ago I remember the fear and excitement I felt. Fear for safety, for what changes would occur, for what I would do as a father. Excitement for the joy in seeing the miracle of birth, for what I would learn and experience with a child. On this day 13 years ago, I held a baby girl in my hands who wrapped one of her little hands around my finger. On this day 13 years ago, I held a baby girl in my hands who became wrapped around, over, under and through my heart.

My baby girl is growing up. She’s a teenager now and she is on her way to becoming more than I ever imagined for her. She is beautiful, intelligent and insightful. She likes to sleep late and leave a mess in her wake. She is a young girl growing into a beautiful woman with a lot of grace and dignity but also with fears and missteps. She is not unlike many young women of her age, wanting to make her path and yet confused at times about which way to go. On the other hand, she is unlike many young women because she is my daughter and I see the beauty in her that only a parent can see.

My baby girl loves God and I love her because of it. She inspires me and makes me want to be a better father than I have been. She is a blessing that is beyond description.

Happy Birthday little girl. You are not so little anymore but you still have my finger, and my heart, in the grip of your hand.

I can’t seem to get off the treadmill of stuff that has to be done. No matter how fast or slow I go, it just keeps coming. The weight of it all is starting to weigh me down. Right or wrong, I’m finding myself in prayer more often asking God to help me, to help me find the way. I do not like these times. I feel so lost like someone so close to the shore but not able to reach it wondering when the waves are going to overtake me. It’s hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I know there are many others faced with the same feeling. I don’t know any way out other than taking one thing at a time and asking God for guidance. I probably make things sound worse than they are. I say that because over the weekend, at least two sets of parents nearby lost their children in a car crash. Whatever I’m feeling today can be nothing like what they are feeling today. I cannot imagine the pain and wish no one else ever would.

In the end, I know this is temporary. Something much, much greater awaits me. The topic of heaven has popped up often in the last few weeks. I taught a class on it two weeks ago. It was again the topic last night at church and has come up in some other conversations. It has been good for me and has helped me set my thoughts on things above, on greater things. I look forward to heaven and I am more ready for Jesus’ return today than ever before. All of my struggles, all of my problems, all of my issues will be gone because of the majesty of God. I look forward to heaven.