Good Grief!

25 Tuesday Mar 2014

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The movie “Noah” is coming out soon and I’m hearing stories of Christians bashing the movie for its lack of biblical accuracy.

Good grief.

I don’t think the studio ever said it was biblically accurate.  I don’t think the studio is really trying their hardest to represent the Bible.  I don’t think the studio minds the dust up and free publicity at all.

Good grief.

I always wonder when people start ranting and raving about stuff like this:

how many of them spend money on movies that are not wholesome at all?

how many of them wile away hours watching TV instead of looking like the church?

It’s easy for me to bash them because I sure don’t do all that I need to be doing but leave the movie-makers alone.  Please.  Squabbling over a movie takes away time from what Jesus called us to do anyway, seek and save the lost.

Go seek.  Go save.  Leave the movie business to Hollywood and take care of Christ’s business.

Grace and peace.

Someone Always Has It Worse?

18 Tuesday Mar 2014

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One of my points in my Job lesson was that we Christ-followers need to empathize better.  We need to be at peace with the lack of peace.  And with silence.

Job’s friends did a great job of supporting him for 7 days.  Not a word was spoken among them.  Then the 8th day came and everything fell apart.  His friends were full of advice, full of the wisdom that comes with not having a clue what someone is going through but feeling like you need to say something.

“Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.” – The Desiderata

The peace there may be in silence.

I have very dear friends who lost a daughter a few years back.  I remember hearing people tell them “God had a plan” and “read this book and it will help” and “sometimes we don’t understand until later” which may all be well and good.  At some point.  BUT IT’S NOT GOOD IN THE DARKEST MOMENTS OF THE MOST INTENSE PAIN!

God has a plan in their daughter dying?  Please!  Do enlighten us.  God has a plan for a divorce?  Please!  Share this great understanding of yours.  Read a book or listen to a sermon?  Oh yes, that is exactly what I want to do when I feel like my insides are being ripped out of my body.  We’ll understand later?  Then SHUT UP because if I don’t know and you don’t know we don’t need to pretend we know we will understand later.

As I come through a divorce and share the pain, especially for my kids, people still say, “maybe it will help them down the road.”  Yes, and just maybe they will become serial killers too.  Don’t dampen my spirits and don’t give me false hope.  No one knows what will happen so just be quiet.

Bart is one of my very best friends.  When I am in pain, when I want the world to end, when 300 pounds of tears flow out of my 250 pound body, Bart has a pretty standard line.  “I love you and I am here for you.”  Bart knows my pain and he knows he doesn’t have any more insight into the future than I do.  He doesn’t try to “help” or tell me someone else has it worse.  He simply lets me know he is there.  He doesn’t try to force his way in or figure it out.  He simply hurts with me until I’m ready to talk, ready to seek advice, ready to find ways to nullify the pain.  Bart will run through brick walls for me if I ask.  AND, he will sit quietly with me.

I think Job wishes he would have had friends that would have been quiet awhile longer.  Most of us don’t have some great wisdom that no one else has.  Most of us don’t understand the pain someone else is going through, even when we have lived through similar situations because no situation has the same mix of characters, personalities and issues.

Christ-followers need to empathize with the hurting, with those who can’t see through the darkness, with those who want to curl up and die instead of facing the pain of this life, even when it’s temporary.  Empathy doesn’t come from worldly wisdom, it comes with presence.

Be quiet.  Be present.

Grace and peace.

There Are Battles

13 Thursday Mar 2014

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When you stop to think about it, I’m not a very cheerful writer.  I talk about my difficulties, my obstacles, the things that knock me to my knees.  Those things are often front of mind because I know so many other people who struggle and are afraid to admit it.  Or don’t know they can admit it.  Or don’t think they have an acceptable outlet to admit it.  I’m always on the lookout for those people to let them know, YES, there are battles.  AND, yes, we can overcome them.  Or at least get through them.

Last week, I had the privilege to speak to men at a church in a fairly small Texas town.  A country town.  An agricultural town.  A man’s man town.

I talked about Job.  I talked about struggles.  I talked about some dark days I have been through.  I assured them that we can look at Job’s life and know that one day things will be better.  The wounds may not completely heal.  The scars may not go away.  One day things will be better.  In this life or another but God will lead us through if we are faithful.  That doesn’t mean perfect.  In my darkest hours, I yell at God, furiously, with anger and say things I shouldn’t say.  My darkness hurts.  Bad.  Yet, I get through it because I eventually remember that I am not in control of this messed up world and I simply need to look for a sliver of light in the moment.

Two men approached me after the lesson with the same message.  “I don’t think I would have killed myself but I have faced a challenge that was so dark, I can now understand how someone could go there.”

Wow.  These were two men’s men, show no weakness, pull yourself up by your bootstraps kind of men.  At that moment, I was there outlet to say something they have never said to anyone else.  Their outlet to let it go.  Their outlet to be affirmed that darkness sometimes overwhelms us.

I’m sure some people get tired of listening to my darkness stories but some people need to know that there is someone out there who understands, who empathizes and has compassion for others who face darkness.  I like to think of myself as an instrument of peace, a place where they can share hurt and find peace on the other side.  I like to think that is how God uses me.

Next week will be some of my points from the lesson on Job.  Nothing new.  Nothing profound.  Just simple thoughts from a simple brain that hopefully will help me always remember that there is light coming to take over darkness.

I am blessed.  I have two incredible kids.  I have the love of a remarkable woman.  I have some incredible friends who I can share anything with who will pick me up and help hold me upright until I’m ready to walk on my own again.  There is light in my darkness.  Always has been.  Always will be.

Grace and peace.

The Problem with Insecurities

06 Thursday Mar 2014

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The problem with insecurities is feeling insecure.

I don’t always write profound statements but I think that’s one for the ages.

Seriously, insecurities eat at me.  Mine have the most persistent voices of anyone I know.  They tell me I’m not good enough.  That I don’t provide enough.  That I don’t measure up (to a multitude of people and things).  That I’m not good looking.  That I can’t make people happy.  That I’m not worth of love or forgiveness.

OUCH!  Those last two really sting.

The crazy thing about insecurities is that we often find ourselves insecure about something with someone else who is insecure about something and all we see are our own insecurities so it compounds the problem.

I want to quiet the voices of my insecurities.  I want to believe they are false and that I don’t need to feel the way they make me feel.  Sure, I may not be good enough at times.  Sure, someone may not love me at times.  I want to accept that just because those things happen, they are not my identity.

Easier said than done.

I’m a work in progress.

Grace and peace.

Sometimes We All Need A Feel Good Story

04 Tuesday Mar 2014

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It seems like everyday is a battle.  I know it’s a battle of the mind.  I get to choose how I feel about things.  That said, it’s not always that easy.  There are other factors and forces at work and choosing isn’t as simple as “do I get a donut with sprinkles or without.”  So, in these times, it often helps to hear feel good stories that give hope.

And make you look at all your blankets…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BikR-YB4lBg

Grace and peace.

Where You Been?

28 Friday Feb 2014

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I took a blogging holiday.  Sort of.  The truth is, I went through a few dark weeks.  I listened to the demons.  I saw the negative in everything.  It was dark.

It happens to me every so often.  I should say, I let it happen every so often.  My best friend in college called it my “dark mood” and said he made sure to stay away for a couple of weeks.  I was angry at God.  I was angry at the postman.  I was angry at the parking lot attendant.  I was angry with where I’m living.  I was angry at the guy in the fast food line.  Seriously, how many questions are there to ask at Taco Bell?

Then it happened.  “It” was a word from a friend.  “It” was a reminder that he loved me and saw the best in me no matter what I was going through.  “It” was another friend at church who said he loved me and he had hope that we would celebrate the trip out of the valley and darkness.  “It” was a wonderful woman who couldn’t fully understand why I acted the way I did but loved me anyway and stood by me.

I have been blessed with a host of friends.  I don’t know why they like me and stick by me but they do.  The closest of the close stick by me when the dark moods come and when my outlook is all about poor, pitiful me.  They don’t see the ugliness I exhibit on the outside, they only choose to see what they know is on the inside which is a better me, a positive me, a loving me.  They choose who they see and they treat me like the person I want to be instead of the person I’m acting out to be.

Where I’ve been was dark and ugly and I am so thankful that I have the people in my life who grab hold of me, prop me up and slowly walk me forward into the light and the hope of a new day.

Grace and peace.

The Inheritance

14 Friday Feb 2014

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I am spending my Wednesday nights sitting in a room with many admitted drug addicts and many others who are quietly dealing with their own addictions and sins.  It is a classroom where the teachers always point out that the past is the past and that no stones will be thrown.  We are all sinners.  We are all in need of the grace and mercy of the LORD.

Last night, I saw this video for the first time.  It’s seven minutes long so be prepared.  Well worth it, I believe.

The Inheritance

Grace and peace.

Doing the Church Thing

11 Tuesday Feb 2014

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I’ve got a friend I haven’t spent that much time with but feel like we’ve been friends since we were two.  I think we both think about a lot of things in similar ways with some differences thrown in to keep it lively.  One of the things we’ve been discussing lately is “church” – how it’s done, what it means and why we go.  Something he said the other day really struck a chord with me and I thought…

“Isn’t is odd that we try to define and confine to certain standards something (church, that is) that Jesus was doing that was radical?”

I’ve often said I grew up being taught the “Gospel of Attendance” and heard often, “do not forsake the assembly” as the mantra for who we were and why we did what we did.  Guess what?  If the assembly is trying to live out the Gospel by convincing the Baptists to dump the piano and that the “Church of Christ” is a non-denominational, singularly correct church, then the assembly just might need to be forsaken.

God-in-a-box isn’t what I read about in the Bible.  I’ve spent years listening to teaching on instrumental music, baptism, women’s roles and other areas of “worship” and there is so little of that in the life of Jesus, the true Gospel.  Jesus told Peter he was building his church “on this rock” but it wasn’t a physical rock Christ was talking about, it was the heart of a man who wanted to be a disciple.

We don’t find church on a street corner, in a big building with a nice sign out-front and ample parking for hundreds, if not thousands, of people.  WE FIND CHURCH IN OUR HEART’S DESIRE TO BE A DISCIPLE.  We don’t find church as acts of worship, we find church on the streets, we find church serving the poor, the broken, the orphans and widows, the homeless and hungry, and we find it in reaching those who have so much (materially), they do not understand or have a passion for what they lack (spiritually).

My life has been pretty easy.  I’ve had more than I needed and it was easy to sit on a pew and enjoy the show.  Nod my head and talk about what a great lesson the preacher laid down on my way to Luby’s.  That was church for me for far too many years.

I now find church in my vulnerability.  When I am willing to be transparent about my life, my decisions and my actions, I often find church.  When I am willing to sit with a drug addict, or in a classroom of them, and tell them our life worked out differently but our hearts and our heartaches have traveled many of the same roads AND God still loves and is ready to embrace us, I often find church.  When I’ve sat on a creek bank with men who were homeless and when I’ve cried all the way home leaving them in 108 degree heat while I headed back to a working A/C unit, I often find church.  When I talk to a true friend, one I can be completely honest with, and share my heartache, my brokenness and my fears, I often find church.

Do you want to know if you are doing “church” right.  When your life looks like Christ’s example in the Bible, I’m confident you’ll know you are on the right road.

I say all of this boldly also knowing I have so much to learn about what being a disciple means.  This is where my heart is today.  It’s where Jesus is leading me today.  When I get it all figured out, I will be sure and lead with that.  Until then, I’m just pouring out what is on my heart and my mind.  God, give me grace.

Grace and peace/Kica Ki Kuc

Then There’s That…

05 Wednesday Feb 2014

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It’s National Signing Day and the Red Hot Chili Peppers were miming at the Super Bowl but there’s two other stories I’m focused on over exploiting young men for money (schools make lots off the sweat of these kids) and pre-recorded music (I just happen to listen to pre-recorded music everyday since my truck isn’t big enough to load up the band for a live performance).

First, CVS is going to drop the sale of cigarettes.  Let me rephrase that.  CVS is going to drop $1,500,000,000 in annual sales.  Yes, that’s billions of dollars.  It’s important to know the next thing I’m going to say is a little hypocritical but here goes.  Guess where I’m going to start buying my medicines and shopping more?  Yes, CVS!  Sure, I’ll still shop at Wal-Mart that sells cigarettes and Little Debbie snack cakes that taste so good but don’t really help a Type 2 Diabetic in the long term but I’ll take more of my dollars to CVS than I have in the past.  Good on them for standing up for what they believe is right.

Second story, Ken Ham and Bill Nye debating creationism.  I didn’t hear the debate and didn’t know about it until this morning.  I read a TIME article and then started reading the comments.  Lots of non-believers weighing in on the fallacy of the Bible and pointing out many of the things we believers wish we didn’t have to think about (slavery, God taking lives, why and OT and NT if it’s all perfect) at times.  So, why do I have faith and someone else doesn’t.  Why, in all my struggles, through divorce and financial turmoil, do I still pray to God even when I’m angry with Him and another guy doesn’t believe at all who is in the same boat.  Or, someone who is doing much better off than me?  The Bible isn’t a perfect book for people who want to believe in something they can understand.  It’s only a perfect book for those of us who choose to believe in something we cannot comprehend.  My faith is constantly tested and I cannot explain why I continue to walk in faith to someone who wants a logical answer.  It’s just not logical.  To curse God and walk away seems much more logical to me.  Yet, I choose faith.

Oh Lord, I want Jesus to come and come soon.  I don’t seek death, I simply seek Heaven and life where there is no more pain, no more night, where existence is utter joy and complete peace.

Grace and peace.