Walk A Mile In My Shoes

01 Friday May 2015

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I don’t understand all the stuff going on in Baltimore. I don’t understand police officers who treat people the way they treated Freddie Gray. I don’t understand people who move into the streets vandalizing, stealing and setting people’s property on fire.

I don’t understand what happened in Ferguson. I don’t know why the cop shot the kid and I don’t know what the kid did that would make the cop decide to pull the trigger.

I don’t understand what it is like to be a black person in America. I don’t understand what it is to be a person of any color who lives in poverty. I can’t imagine what it is like to be an immigrant, especially one who will wade a river or hold on to a piece of wood hoping to reach American soil.

I do understand this. Race relations, immigration problems and struggles between peoples will not cease until there is more of an effort to understand each other and less intent to make comments about the other without the aid of understanding.

Jen Hatmaker wrote a great post about the Baltimore riots. Find it and read it.

I am amazed how many of my white, southern friends who have so much advice for the people in Baltimore. I am amazed by the number of people who are so quick to judge the police officers, the men and women on the streets who deal with addicts, murderers and who knows what all on a daily basis and expect them to treat everyone like they were dealing with perfect people.

I do know this. Advice from people who have no #$%^&*@ clue of what other people are dealing with have little, if any, right to speak up. That includes me. I am a fabulous armchair quarterback. I have all the answers from my little world. Yet, I have no understanding of what it is like to be a cop dealing with the worst of the worst or a person who has lived in oppression of any kind.

Now that the police officers in Baltimore may be indicted for murder, I don’t know what to expect but doubt it will bring peace. My guess is it will make for more speculation, more antagonism, more mouthing. I hope, at some point, there will be a call for more heart, more kindness, more grace.

I can hope, can’t I?

Grace and peace.

Hurting in a Hard World

19 Wednesday Nov 2014

Posted by Seeking Peace in Life, Uncategorized

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hope, hurt, love, Nouwen, pain, peace

When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. – Henri Nouwen

This quote resonates loudly with me. Rick, Jason, Bart, Jacob, Rick, Everett and Dennis have loved me through very hard, very dark days. They were with me daily, in person, by text or on the phone. Certainly in prayer. That extends out to Joey, David, Joe, Doyle, Mark, Jerry, Garry, Joe, Amy, Kyle, Zach, Beverly, Jeff, John, Dan, Barry, Donnie, Chris and many other people. They walked with me too. Then, there is my VSW. Kelly. My gift of grace from God. So much light in my life. So rich and deep in her soul. Overflowing with hope and joy and love.

Some people never have one person that allows this quote to fit their lives. I have a host of people. I am tempted to question why some times but better judgment allows me to simply be thankful. So today, I write about hurt and pain and anger and darkness from a different point of view. I have walked through the valley of the shadow of death, or as I like to say, I have walked the edge of hell and came through it because so many people were holding my hands, pulling me, pushing me, holding me up, hugging me, encouraging me, challenging me, crying with me, laughing with me…loving me, loving me always, loving me unconditionally.

So today I look at Ferguson, Missouri and I empathize with so many people who are hurting. On all sides of the issue. I pray for peace in the midst of the storm. I pray for conversation instead of gunfire, hope instead of stones.

So today I am thankful my VSW’s niece can call my VSW and share her hurt and know there is someone who will listen and love and hope and encourage.

So today I am praying for a friend of a friend of my VSW who is angry at God. I do not know his specific journey but I know anger at God. I pray he will find peace, that his anger will be focused where it belongs and he can find a way to forgive.

I hate a world full of hurt, hate, anger. I want a world that does not include what is happening in Ferguson, drug addiction, suicide or Charles Manson. I can hate what is bad and hope for something completely different than what is but that doesn’t make it go away.

So, in the middle of all of the mess I want to be a person who will share pain and touch wounds with a warm and tender hand. I want to be the person that so many others have and continue to be in my life. I want to be hope and peace and love.

Grace and peace.

The Dent

27 Monday Jan 2014

Posted by Seeking Peace in Christian Living, Life

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grace, hurt, ice, mercy, wreck

I have driven on ice in Texas for the past 35 years and never had a dent or ding to my vehicle. My dad taught me to drive on ice when I was 15. He had been stationed in Greenland in the Air Force so he knew all about ice driving and shared it with me. They were lessons that have paid dividends over the years so that I’ve never missed a day of work or had any injuries due to ice. Slow and steady wins the race on those days.

Last Thursday, we had ice on the ground when I came to work. No problems for me. I was in my office when the receptionist came in and told me a coworker had run into my truck and wanted me to come outside. Well, sure enough, the lady was trying to pull into a spot close to me and slid right into my back door. Man, she felt horrible. She told everyone at work about it, put it on Facebook and apologized to me multiple times. I constantly reminded her it was only metal. No people were hurt and that was all that was important. Three other people at work came and asked me if I was okay. Of course, I said. I only felt bad for my coworker who never meant to cause harm and was only doing her best to be a good employee.

Life is like that. We go for years and nothing too bad happens and then someone dings us even when they didn’t mean to. It makes me wonder how many times I have dinged other people emotionally or spiritually without meaning to do it…and may have been completely oblivious to it.

Insurance will pay for the damage. It will be fixed and we’ll both go on. No blood, no foul. It isn’t always that easy with the emotional and spiritual damage we cause. Sometimes those dents last a long, long time. I pray for heapings of grace and mercy when I have run into someone else without meaning to and even more grace and mercy when I did it knowing I could choose another path.

I’m thankful Christ has already paid the insurance bill for the dents I cause.

Grace and peace.

A Bad Week

20 Saturday Apr 2013

Posted by Seeking Peace in Christian Living, Life

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discipline, hurt, love, pain

Last week was tough. Hard. Bad. Boston, MA and West, TX were the highlights of a week of bad news, death, tragedy and pain. The question “why?” keeps coming to the forefront of my mind. I know I will not get an answer anytime soon and don’t need one.

As I write this, I’m listening to Fox News and their reporters certainly want to get to the bottom of the how, why and who of the two men suspected of setting the bombs off in Boston. (Note: I am not a Fox News fan.) Supposedly they are Russian. Maybe they are Muslim. Whatever they are or were, they both had hearts turned against a loving God and likely had wounds that drove them to do such disastrous things.

As I think on this the thought of how bad so many hate “radical Muslims”, call them terrorists and think they deserve the harshest response they get. It leads to so many questions for me. How do those people respond to “radical Christians” and the tyranny they bring to killing and hating those they oppose? Why are people who come into the country and kill Americans with bombs terrorists but crazy folks who walk into a theater or school with a gun not terrorists?

Our society is bad about putting layers or priorities to the bad things that happen in our world and happen to us. So is the church.

I look forward to the day I treat everyone as a child of God, scarred by the world, sinful and broken. In these times, I pray I treat them equally and love them equally. I am not saying discipline is not a response, only that I want to be careful to treat those who hurt me with the same measure God would require.

“Do to others as you would have them do to you” applies in the good times and the bad times. It’s not always easy though.

Grace and peace.